Is it Friday Already?
I’m not going to lie, I’ve had a breakdown or two over the past few months.
Planning a wedding is hard… and not just in the sense that it’s a lot of work (although… it is). Planning a wedding is also hard in the sense that there are a lot of competing interests, even within yourself, that you somehow have to beat into submission long enough to allow one — the right one — to rise to the top.
Now, some people might not take this route. They might sit back, zen-like, and let the right choice come to them…. but not me. I tend to like to bash my head against a wall.
To be honest, I’m really lucky. I have laid back parents, a relatively stable financial life (for now) and a fiancé who would go to the ends of the earth to bring me a little light. I don’t have a lot to complain about. Mostly — it’s just me.
From the DJ to the decor to the size, shape, and everything in between, I’ve debated each little option to death. A million brides and bridal blogs will tell you not to do this. Don’t flip out. Yes, it’s an important day… but what really matters is that you are marrying the person you love.
Well, yes. But I’ll never be the person who takes that advice and breathes a sigh of relief. Because if that were truly the case, we would go to the courthouse tomorrow. We would have eloped. But the honest truth is that we want to celebrate our big fat love in front of all of our friends and we want it to be perfect… we might even want to impress them a little (admit it).
And why not? The darn thing is expensive. If it were just about us we would take a month-long vacation around the world and get married by a sherpa in Bhutan… but we want to celebrate with the ones we love. And because they’re involved, the scope of the celebration widens. We start to make choices to please our guests, instead of ourselves.
But somewhere in there — there is a balance. And maybe I need to talk to the zen master I mentioned earlier (any of you out there?) but what works for me is to occasionally say “screw everyone else.”
This serves to knock my nagging desire to please back down to size… and put me back within the realm of “eager to please… but sufficiently selfish.”
I like that balance best.
And I do still want to share links… if you’re not sick of hearing from me by now!
Here are a few things I’m loving…
… maybe even printed pants?
This simple, pretty table.
The honey badger… in drink form.
This looks delicious.
Photo: Tanja Lippert